Hey All -
I get the privilege to address you directly this time. I guess Meg has the confidence (or maybe superior editing skills) to make sure it reads correctly and concisely. Between the pain meds and sleep deficiency, it's been hard to concentrate, let alone read or even string a sentence together. Here goes nothing ;)
Yesterday was a better day and maybe one of the better ones I’ve had in the past 3-4 weeks. Now better is a relative term, but I was able to sit up downstairs for the better part of the day. So praying that with each day and a little more healing, I’ll be able to lower the need for pain meds which will reduce the other side effects.
Since the last post, though not much has changed, we did learn that the recurrence of cancer is most likely from the esophageal which I had way back in 2011/2012. I know this shocked Meg and I just from the duration it was ‘dormant’. But we also get the sense that the doctors are just as puzzled. Therefore, at this point with some other genetic markers, we will see how the Oncology team will deal with it for me.
The second and really unfortunate effect of having the catheter drainage put into my lungs was the recovery time needed. Therefore, Meg and I weren’t able to go with her family on their beach vacation this year. This past week, just trying to make it to NIH for recovery treatment was enough to wipe me out for that day and the next. The really hard decision was made, but the blessing was that we could still send the kids with other family members. And what a blessing that was, as they need their own time away and a breather from all of the heaviness that we are dealing with. Right now it does help not having them worry as we work through appointments here. Even with the ROCKSTAR support network we have, I’ve seen the toll it is already taking on Meg to make sure everyone is set up and where they need to be.
Now with me not going on the beach trip, we’ve been able to get into the oncology rotation a week sooner. Though we still are praying on whether this is the right path, I have an appointment on Tuesday to get a PICC line put in and then start my first round of chemo on Wednesday. While we recognize no chemo is curative, they believe that this might loosen up my abdomen to allow for more food and fluid with the hope of gaining some weight back and reducing some of the pain.
With this all happening so fast, one of the hardest things I had to do was to cancel a fishing trip to Canada that Tyler and I had been planning for months. We were so excited to spend some ‘dude-time’ together and really use it as a rite of passage. The day we were to leave I was in the hospital, so we had to flex quickly. So as quickly as the fishing trip had to be put on hold, we decided that we’d all go as a family to watch Taylor play volleyball in Florida. The silver lining and what God knew we needed was some sweet time together as a family. Though it was a tough trip for me physically, we got some good family time and the team was so gracious to me. Check out the pics of the sweatshirt the families on the team blessed me with to wear as we cheered on our girls. After this team having been together for 7+ months it feels like one big family!
Also wanted to share how God’s been working over these last couple weeks. First, I don't have enough space to articulate how the many financial blessings have matched areas where we weren’t even thinking. Second, having the kids still go on the beach trip, though it time away, will restore their souls and their hearts. Third, we have felt confident so far in the decisions we’ve been praying about.
We do ask that you continue to pray alongside us, for it be clear on each next step we need to take on treatment, pain management and/or palliative care. We also can’t THANK YOU enough for your love, support, help with the kids, meals and financial blessings you’ve flooded us with.
Love,
J
